Resolution 2011

For the last three weeks I have been in London. I know, cry me a river, I just had to go to London for work. You don't get a lot of sympathy when you tell people that! However, this is the time of year that is horrid. The holidays came and went (poof in the night and they were gone...seriously...where oh where did Santa go?) and with it any free time. From December 26th until December 30th my life revolved around getting ready for for London. What to pack, what I needed to buy, did my London "wardrobe" still fit? Then there was what to stock up for at home, getting outfits put together for LitlBit so daddy could figure out the morning routine, clearing all traces of Christmas from the house...the list goes on and on ad nauseum. Finally, the day of departure comes. Did I pay that bill? Was the kitchen fully stocked? So many questions roaming through my head. Now, three weeks later I have returned. I am back fully jetlagged taking on the world without knowing what time of day (or even simply what day) it is! Now, it is more of a mission. The mission to put my life of chaos back in order. Clothes to wash, a house to clean, a daughter to get back into a routine, and an office left alone for a month to tackle. Who says a working mom is not superwoman? I beg to differ! It takes a special type of person in my opinion to juggle eggs! That is exactly what I feel like I am juggling too. One false move and crash, crack, gone. Something is irrevocably broken, messed up, or simply just made into a huge catastrophe. Yep, only superwoman can manage this juggling circus act!

For all the problems that this latest work trip has caused there is one positive that has come out of it. Resolution. I know it is trite and quite cliche but a resolution for the New Year. This has to be the first one of its kind in my life span. Don't get me wrong, I am not a complete scrooge. However, the concept of making lofty goals on December 31st just for the sake of doing it on December 31st has never attracted me. Really similar to the idea of Valentine's Day. The one day of the year that people act as though they fell in love for the first time...forget the other 364 days they forget the other exists. I suppose they still have the faint memory of the flowers in the back of their minds, eh? No, New Year's resolutions have always seemed a bit fake in my opinion. So, why this year? Why did I go against my better judgment and have one? Well, I did not...well...purposefully that is. While watching probably the greatest fireworks display in possibly the world on that cold night I thought about my family. How much I wished they were there to share it. How thankful that I am they are there to come home to. I realized that my family has been taking second place to a lot of things this past year. Work being thief number one. First part of resolution 2011...turn off email push notifications! If it is that important...they should know my phone number. Also, not everything is that important. Things can wait. People can wait. It can all wait. Turn off the noise and notice what is right there. Work will always be there. But a five year old won't. People won't. This time won't. That five minutes that I gave to check and answer an email just because of the ding on the phone will never be returned. Those five minutes add up quickly too! The second thought from resolution 2011 was simply to get back to who I used to be. Years ago I loved the Doors. Jim Morrison was fascinating to me. Their lyrics almost mesmerizing if you really listened. One of my favorite songs was People are Strange. Love that song to this day. Three simple words but so full of truth. People are strange! Sometimes it ends right there. There is not always something behind the facade. Every once in awhile people are exactly what they appear to be...shallow...unthinking...conceited...strange. There is not a need to understand their thoughts or actions. Not a need to figure out their motives or neuroses in life. They are who they are and that is that. Their actions make not a difference in my world as a whole. For someone who wants to know why and fix a situation or find a solution this is a hard concept. Somehow, I have made it hard over the years though. I used to be the first person who would tell you this...now I am the one needing a reminder! So, for resolution 2011 I am going to try to remember what I always believed...people are strange. Ignore it. At work...take care of the issue...don't get involved in the problem. With family...I can't fix someone else's issues. They have to be the one to see it, work on it, and fix it. One day they will realize this. Until then...during the time...and after the fact...it is their problem to own...not mine. So far, resolution one is on target! No working from home unless I am doing it on pre-planned work from home days. Resolution two...people are strange so deal? So far so good. No great wonderings or carings about things that I cannot change, attitudes that I cannot make better, shallowness that seems to span chasms. Nope...can't change it. People are how they are for good or bad. The irresolute parent, the irritating colleague, the shallow and conceited person...they are who they are. At the end of the day they do not live with me. So, guess what? They have to live with their blood pressure rising for nothing, their containment of lies, their childish ways and false pretenses. I get to go home and listen to The Doors'...People Are Strange and laugh! You see, I now have time for that...since the phone no longer dings with emails and I no longer care about the strangeness of the people!